What I Aim To Do

In the next two days, I intend to come up with my New Year's resolutions. Unlike so many of the empty promise-makers out there, I actually stick to mine, and I remember them often throughout a year.

Last year's [though unposted] included being nicer to the Italian, practicing patience when dealing with idiots, and focusing on my own happiness when I would have otherwise forgotten it.

I'm happy to announce that I was successful on all three. Though minimally, I considered myself to be nicer to Scarface overall [it's just so hard!]. I tried my best to be patient with the morons who attend my school. I also learned more and more about happiness, and have come to realize exactly what kind of life I intend to lead in order to be happy.

For 2008, I'm going to come up with eight new resolutions. Some more specific, some strangely vague. But no matter the level of detail, you can bet I'll stick to them.

Will I promise to get into shape? Of course I will. I'm a bit pro-health. Will I swear to "fall in love"? Lol. Yeah. Lemme see how that turns out...

For now, however, I will not bore you with the details. Expect more from me in a few days, when I've had more time to think them over and word them correctly.

Until then, keep it real. Abbs is out.

XOXOXOh,Xmas...

Ah, Christmas. My least busy time of year. We sit around the fire as a family and drink hot cocoa from coffee mugs that never spill, and light pretty candles to make the room smell like gingerbread. Presents magically appear under the tree, and we each unwrap our hearts' desires with bright, white smiles and shrieks of joy. We spend the rest of the week lounging in our matching plaid pajamas, wearing hand-knit sweaters and reading classic novels in the wee hours of the morning...

Ha [snort]. Yeah, right.

My Christmas break sounds like something from a movie played fast-forward. I've baked hundreds of cookies so far--literally, hundreds... probably somewhere near three or four hundred--and the celebrations have already begun. I did my last-minute shopping at, well, the last minute, and I am bewildered to proclaim that the holidays shall now commence.

Yesterday was my "Christmas Eve" with my father, and today was our "Christmas Day." I spend tonight and tomorrow with my mother and her immediate family. Wednesday I'm with my dad's family, and I spend the weekend [Friday-Sunday] at my dad's as well. The 31st and 1st are quite obviously dedicated to a New Year's get-together, and the 2nd of January is Thena's birthday.

Thursday is my only day off, in case you can't exactly picture the week in your head as I am right now [because, of course, you're suddenly panicked and overwhelmed]. All but Thursday are peppered with plans.

It's not that I don't like Christmas; it's that I get an overdose. I love my family and I love my friends. I love to give my cousins and aunts and uncles gifts.

Anything can be "good" for you if it's taken in moderation. But a surplus is just... well, a surplus. Let's hope that I can push through this week and still keep a smile on my face.

Happy Christmas, everyone. Rest as much as you can. :]

Check Your Ego [Before I Check it For You]

I can't stand the arrogant. Or the egotistical. They make me sort of nauseous.

But their one redeeming quality--in my eyes--is that they provide me with a continuous, enduring source of entertainment.

Lol.

I Stand Alone

And the words "I believe" come from mouths of agnostics
While great mountains fall and the valleys, they rise
So much is reversed, so much reflected
In the largest of fields, I stand alone
And the people are vanishing
The people are vanishing
I smile to myself because I stand alone
Through the mess, through the war, through the hate and the crime
In the tightest of corners
I still stand
Alone.

--KB, 2007.

Lesson #20: Here, Take This--It'll Give You 5000% Your Recommended Daily Dose of Reality.

Another Wednesday. Another week half over. Another 10-pm, mind-can't-sleep, words-won't-write, "world-gone-mad" blogging session.

I found today that while Americans may lack vitamins [you know, the alphabet], the thing they lack the most is a sense of dignity. A knowledge of what to say, when to say it, how to say it, and--most importantly--to whom it should be said.

So here, in the midst of a wickedly bizarre Wednesday, I propose a Lesson #20:

Give the world the finger.

Give your thumbs-up to the people you support. Give the "hold-on-a-second" index to people and projects that should wait. Give the middle to those bastards who aren't worth the space they occupy. Give the ring to the one who deserves it. Give the pinkie in promises to your best friend and keep the promises you make.

When one isn't enough, add on some more. Show your thumb, index, and pinkie to say I love you [ASL]. Proudly wave the index and pinkie at a concert. Use the thumb and index to call your friend a loser when you're goofing around. Use all but the thumb to be from Star Trek. Hold up the middle three to be a Girl Scout.

And when those combinations just won't cut it--when life demands the ultimate sacrifices and leaves you with nothing--battle on with fists bared. Fight with life until your knuckles and defenses break.

My world, your world, his world, her world, their world. It's all in the palm of your hand.

Snowed In

I woke up this morning without a family. At first, I thought maybe they'd ran to the store to get something or other for breakfast. I stumbled from my room, tripped down the stairs, and went to the front window.

Um, no store. They were outside shoveling/attacking the eight.5 inches of snow we'd received throughout the night. :]

Of course, it's a whole day early for me to even consider the possibility of a snow day, and the inclement conditions have all of us trapped within the confines of our own homes for the duration of the day, but I'm still excited.

It's so pretty. Having grown up surrounded by ridiculous snowfalls, you'd think that I would be desensitized to its beauty. But I'm not. I still love the purity and glossy shimmer of a brand new snowfall.

We'll be having blizzard-esque weather for the rest of the day, and throughout the night the snowplows will come through and trap us all in our driveways. The main roads will be cleared and covered in salt to kill the ice, and anyone who doesn't have perfect traction on their tires is doomed to drive 15 mph under the speed limit [naturally, almost all students have awful tire traction... Ought to be a fun ride to school tomorrow].

Mmm. Michigan weather. To all of you who live in and around my home state, good luck getting out of your driveway tomorrow morning. :]

"Grant" Him a Life Sentence

If Stephen Grant doesn't get locked up with a life sentence, I will move to a different country.

He murdered his wife, dismembered her body, and hid the pieces at a local park. I've been to that park! I was on the beach right next to the location of his wife's body parts!

My parents' tax dollars are covering this guy's behind. Not only paying for his food, but also his medical bills [recovering from almost freezing to death, remember?], his lawyer, and his shelter.

He should have never been rescued from the freezing forest in the first place. What loss would he have been to society? Not much, I bet.

What a total sicko. Sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. If he only gets 10 years for dismembering, I will move [if I can...].

Even more terrifying is the fact that these deranged people live among us every single day, waiting for the moment to strike. Every day on the news I hear about another shooting in a mall, or a school, or a home... Each day there's more to learn about death in our world.

Answer me this: What's the point of living in the first place, if we're only going to die? And don't give me any crap about "happiness," either. If you don't exist, you don't know if you're happy or sad. You won't be anything at all. You're nonexistent.

Life has no purpose, I've come to see. It's worthless. If it can be stolen so quickly, so easily, then it must not be very valuable.

And yet I keep on living! I don't fear death in its entirety, but I do fear pain--a fear that keeps me firmly grounded in the reality that I must protect myself from any course of action that could be damaging to my well-being. But if my life is worthless, then am I worthless? Am I nothing more than nothing?

I am. We all are. It's not pessimism, it's the truth. Suck it up and keep on truckin', 'cause the world's not getting any better.

Not even a little bit.

Música :]

Yep, I've done it. I added a music player to this blog. Sorry if it scared you when you opened the page. :P

But I was getting sick of just talking about all these songs I love. It's so much better to play music than to just sit around and discuss it...

If you don't like it, it's at the bottom, so you can turn it down or shut it off. Whatever you feel is necessary. Oh, and feel free to play any of the songs there [that's why they're there...].

Have fun, folks. :D

Favorite Post Awards [2007]

I was just sorting through all of my old posts on this site. Some were good, some were bad, and some were just plain stupid. Yet I don't regret any of them...

But these are the favorites of 2007 [so far]. Click the link to read:

¿Cierto o Falso?
Permanence
All We Do is Kill.
Yarn and Plastic
I'm Laying Down My Gun
Bodies Recovered: 0
To Those Like Me
Connections
Plan Be
Sock It To 'Em
For a Moment
It's Simply a Difference of Opinion...
Gasp! :O
The Essence of Evil, Hatred, and Pure Distaste


Have fun, readers. You've already read these, but I felt like sharing them again anyway.

Oh, and I'm not crazy. I just reread some of my old posts. I didn't write some of them very well... make me sound like some nutso...

But whatever. Better to make a joke out of it and just laugh off my failure to predict how those posts would be interpreted.

At least you know what goes on in my head. :D

Please Don't Rip My Arms Off; I'd Like to Keep Them...

This will be brief, because I need to go to bed as soon as possible:

Every get the feeling that there are imaginary "people" [stressors, really] that are tugging on all of your limbs, threatening to tear you to bits? Yeah, that's kind of what I'm going through.

I did homework all weekend. Literally, all weekend. From 3 pm Friday until 10 pm Sunday. I got minimal breaks to attend a play on Friday, eat, and sleep, but other than that I was working my bum off.

How about that sensation that you're barely hanging on to the edges of a bottomless hole? Your hands are slipping on the crumbling dirt, and all the people have come to watch you fall...

I'm having a rough week. I just hope it goes up from here.

-Abbs is [muy cansada, y] out.