The Essence of Evil, Hatred, and Pure Distaste

After much evaluation and consideration, I have come to the conclusion that it is unavoidable to be completely and utterly disgusted at the indecencies of human nature.

Evil, hatred, and distaste. The three categories in which I place human action and choice. Find me a person who dwells only in good, whose actions and choices speak only of benevolence and charity. I promise you, it is naught but philanthropy, "fake" goodness. And it disgusts me.

You cannot deny that even you are to blame. You cannot deny that at least once in your lifetime you have committed philanthropy, either for public acceptance, approval, or praise. I'm just as much at fault as anyone else--my evils, if materialized, would tower over me in a pile. I cannot and will not claim to be perfect, or even anywhere close. I am just as evil as anyone else.

Is evil chosen? No. It is nature, it is the beast within. Beneath your surface you have just as many natural, evolved instincts as the next human. Completely unavoidable (though not unable to be repressed... read on).

Is hatred chosen? Yes and no. Some hatred is created from your environment, absorbed through the words of others and what they feel deserves to be hated. Some hatred is forced into a society, forced to be kept alive even though it makes little sense. But as an adult, a human can make the choice to hate, the decision to loathe entirely whatever it is they feel strongly against. Hatred can be changed, but it would take time and lots of it to do so.

Is distaste chosen? Yes. As a temporary idea, distaste is selected and enforced, and can be changed more easily. Distaste is not something evolved (such a trait would fall under "hatred") and therefore could not possibly become part of one's being from the beginning. Do not confuse hatred with distaste, for the second a distaste becomes permanently embedded in one's brain it turns into hatred; I am sure that there lies a fine line somewhere drawn between the two, but why waste time arguing over finer points when the big picture is more important?

So distaste can be changed as often as wished, much like the weather, and hatred is a deeper feeling (yet still has to be acquired, not simply there) that can be changed with time. Evil, however, cannot be removed, altered, or "gotten rid of" by simply wanting it gone. Evil is permanent, unchanging, and vague; evil is not directed toward other people, places, things, or ideas. It is directed at everything, the entire world and all beyond it, with its intent solely being to keep oneself in prime condition. It is essentially selfishness, though to be selfish would imply that you had an understanding of what you were taking away from others and still proceeded. Evil does not care what others have, or what others want. It only cares its host, its human, has everything it could possibly want, despite the consequences.

By now, you probably think I'm the most negative person to walk this earth. I don't blame you for thinking such things, but you're wrong. Read on.

Evil, though it cannot go away or change, can be repressed, ignored. If the human host wishes for its evil to step aside, such an action CAN happen. The human can make the choice to override its evil, though difficult, and do something good. If indeed one such individual can overcome its internal evil, it will only make them that much stronger, that much more capable to overcome it again and again and again...

Distaste changes quickly. Hatred changes slowly. Both can be repressed easily. Evil cannot change, but with strength from what we humans call hope, it can be ignored.

Hope. Such an interesting idea. Hope does not appear to come from any exact source; instead, it shows up deep within the mind, a flicker of light in evil's darkness (to be metaphorical). It is the only reason I can sit here and write about evil and hatred and distaste and not feel completely lost. I know that the human race has hope; we have seen people overcome their evil, people being good. We have a chance to make the most of ourselves, and I do not intend to have this chance wasted.

I cannot, will not, and shall never force you to make the choice to repress your evil. If you wish to follow it for the rest of your life, so be it. But if you want to, if you think it sounds enticing, try. Try to hold back when you know what you're doing is wrong. I'm going to try, I really am... And I know I will fail more often than not, as would anyone else, but I refuse to give in. I refuse to let go of that hope.

Call me a dreamer, call me a wisher, call me a liar. I don't care. I have hope for our world, and I defy anyone who tries to drive it out of me.

-Abby