Post V: Five is the loneliest number...

GAH.

I FAILED.

I just KNEW I couldn't do five posts in five days. I'm such a slacker. Remember my resolution to "work diligently?" Yeah, about that... Kind of like a grenade to the forehead. BOOM.

So here's the last of the five, a few days late.

I chose to talk about the number five in my fifth post to be ironic. That title has really only two meanings (though I wish it had five, how cool would that be?) and I will do my best to do them both justice.

To begin, let me reference the fact that it seems to be my fate to always be the fifth wheel amongst my friends. How awkward can it get? Seriously. It seems like there are always two couples, all giggly and smoochy and blehhhhhh... and then there's me. The fifth wheel.

Cars aren't made to run on five wheels for a reason. Tables have four legs for a reason. There are four seasons, four quarters in a dollar, four Beatles, four oceans... Never five. Five is the loneliest number, simply because there isn't room for a fifth. Ever heard of 5/5 time in music? No. Or five slots on a toaster? No.

As so nicely stated in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, "Five is right out." And that's the truth.

Not only am I found to be the fifth amongst my friends, I have also found that on BOTH sides of my family I am the fifth oldest. I'm not talking about ALL the kids, like the cousins I never see, I'm talking about the group of kids that are always at the gatherings (so there are some I'm not counting). In the "core group" on my mother's side, I come after four second cousins; on my father's, after two second cousins and two first cousins.

Why does that even matter, you ask? Well, as I get older, I'm starting to notice a pattern.

The kid gets their license. They bring a girlfriend or boyfriend to a family party for the first time. They graduate, go off to college... Etc. It has always been funny to me, hearing the stay-off-the-road-so-and-so-has-their-license jokes and watching how awkward that first meeting is with the boyfriend/girlfriend. But now I'm terrified.

You see... I'm next.

On my mother's side, anyway. On my father's, I still have some time. I'm not in limelight just yet. But it is still as intimidating.

I know I'll eventually get a license, and graduation isn't far away. But as for the boyfriend thing, I'm stuck. They all have their significant others by their sides at the family gatherings, leaving me two options: either I hang around with them and feel like a loser for not having someone by my side as well, or I join up with the younger kids.

If I move up in rank, I feel stupid. If I move down in rank, I feel like everyone thinks I'm stupid.

I suppose that time will ease this situation, and eventually I'll follow in the footsteps of my older cousins and whoever is next in line will be scared. I know it's normal to feel like you're trapped between age groups when you're a teenager, I already know that. But it doesn't make the transition any easier.

So for now, I'm number five. And five is the loneliest number as far as I'm concerned.

-Abb5igail