Comin' Home

Tomorrow's the big day. Homecoming, I mean. I'll post pictures soon after [maybe... if they're decent].

I don't know if I'm more excited or exasperated. I know I'll have fun; I always do. But there is a small part of me that just doesn't quite understand it all. Yes, dancing is fun. Yes, it's nice to dress up sometimes and try to look pretty for a change. But it's all so superficial--the atmosphere, the pictures, the dates... Ugh.

I guess, once you've seen a deeper side of life, the superficial things lose their glamour. The petty, happy, high school traditions don't seem so important when you're thinking about life as a whole, the future, college, careers, relationships, the evil of the world...

I wish it was easy. I wish a lot of things, don't I? That's all I do, I wish. I sit around and make lots of pretty, superficial wishes, and then find myself to be disappointed when I realize that they're never going to come true.

If I could get rid of my deep side, I would. But I can't. I've earned this depth, this insight that makes me different from everyone else. I've lived through a lot to get to the intellectual point I'm at today.

Always remember that for every single thing you know that I don't, there's something I've come to understand that I would never wish upon you. For every fact you can trump me with, I've got an emotion you've never experienced.

I'm not superior. I'm not even really that intelligent. But I know things that I would never ask you to learn, things that can only be discovered by horrible means. Things I wish I didn't know.

Stay ignorant, and happy. Be superficial and giddy.

Happy homecoming, everyone.