Lesson #22 [Extended Version]

Here's what I know.

I am a somewhat intelligent seventeen-year-old female who thrives on the emotions of other human beings.
I am a survivor of the strong type.
It is a guarantee that the clothes I love the most will be the ones that absolutely cannot be made to fit.
I am incredibly selfish when it comes to information and knowledge, but totally selfless whenever I stop to make a wish.
Wishing, in fact, is my biggest childish tendency.
I love food much more than I should, and I am perpetually hungry.
Being "girly" means "being superficial for a few hours" and being "boyish" just means "not fitting the socially accepted mold set for young girls."
I am open-minded and nonconfrontational until offended or provoked.
I drink my tea with honey and just a bit of sugar, and I always burn my tongue.
I want a prestigious education not for the diploma, but for the way an arrogant man's eyes pop open when he hears a girl can do better than he can.
I am morbidly afraid of fire and burns, but not even the least bit afraid of the concept of death.
And everything I know about myself has the potential to change in an instant.


Here's what I thought I knew.

The world is good and kind and loving.
People should always share.
Love and peace make the world go round.
Everyone cares whether I fail or succeed, and there will always be a shoulder to lean on.
Friends are perfect and rarely make mistakes.
Boys will pay attention to you if you're a good person.
You can be more than just an average human if only you dream it to be so.
You won't wake up looking ugly unless you tell yourself that you are.
All people are equal and everyone recognizes this fact.
Torture and war are a part of previous centuries, not the modern day world.
Love conquers all.


Here's what I learned that made the difference between those two.

In general, people are disgusting and messy and too self-absorbed for their own good.
Love is merely an emotion, and it cannot heal all wounds.
Neither can time.
Brains are okay, but wisdom is better, and the only way to gain the latter is to open the eyes and pay attention to reality.
Theories are exactly that--just theories--and the actual outcome can never, ever be guaranteed.
Being different isn't that great after all, but it's sure better than being the same, so it's best to find a middle ground.
Political arguments are pretty much the most ridiculous waste of time I've ever had the displeasure of enduring.
Going "green" doesn't have meaning, because EVERYONE says they're doing it [and they aren't!].
Standing up for what you believe in is stupid unless somebody listens; otherwise, it's just an empty, pointless belief.
Very few people care if you succeed; more will care to see you fail, and that's not really caring, is it?
You actually don't have to forgive people for their mistakes, including yourself, because some sins are too heavy to be shoved under the rug.
You don't have to be entirely rational about forgiveness, either.
Past creates present, and together they make future.
Emotions are honestly and truly choices, though mastering the ability to control them can be a nightmare.
Boys don't give a damn if you're a "good person"--at least, not until they graduate from high school.
"Peace" pretty much can't happen [considering that all the torture and war inhibits it greatly].
You can't wish yourself to look differently.
People actually aren't equal, but it's not race, gender, religion, or age that separates the groups; it's all based on individual value, and no human being has the right to judge another's value.
Everyone wants something from you and by golly, they're going to get it, no matter how much it hurts.
And finally: There is so, so much that I will never understand about this world that to form a permanent opinion about anything would be profoundly and utterly ignorant.